1. Using fluffy words
Here’s a hit list:
- Nourish your life.
- Nourish your soul.
- Live your best life!
- Red hot sale!
- On sale now!
- Change your life.
And a few thousand more.
Fluffy, generic words hide you in the crowd. It’s boring. They mean nothing to us. Because they are way too broad, way too boring, way too overused. They just blur into the abyss. Which means you haven’t left a mark on us, which means we won’t buy from you. Ouch.
Speak directly to your audience in a language they understand. Speak to them like you’re having a real conversation with them. Show that you understand EXACTLY what pain they’re going through and EXACTLY what they want. No idea where to start? Well, time to don your stilettos and go speak to them.
2. Autoresponder out-of-office emails when you’re not really out-of-office.
Confession: I set this up last year because everyone was doing it and that’s what I thought I should do, only to turn it off less than a month later because even I found the replies fuckin’ annoying.
These emails are the bane of my email life. They are a waste of my time and everyone’s time. So what you take a few days to respond? Let us know that on your Contact page. Most of us get it that you’re a one-woman show and that you’re not at our beck and call 24/7.
Turn them on when you’re really out of office and taking time away from the business. That is actually helpful. But outside of that? Stop it. Just stop it.
3. Spending thousands on a website makeover
Got the dollars to spare? Then go for it. But for fuck’s sake, do your homework first. Rebranding is hard work (I should know, I’ve done it 4 times already) and it’s not just about the make up. It crushes my stone cold rocker heart to see way too many damn beautiful websites only to discover that I have absolutely no idea what that business is about.
True story: I know of someone who has spent over $10,000 on a website and still hasn’t worked out a way to monetise her business. *FACEPALM*
Branding and design is important, but it’s not your number one priority. Establishing a business model that works and is actually what your market wants, is. I get it, strategy and business plans and all those things are boring (not for me, because I’m weird like that) but holy smokes girlfriend, that shit will save your sanity if you do it right. Nothing worse than realising you forked out huge unnecessary dollars on design when you could have spent that money more wisely (like on this or this).
The thing about websites is that they are flexible, malleable beasts. You can test, tweak, adapt, test again. And it will continue to evolve. Because your business will evolve. Do the foundational strategic work first. Then put on your make up.
*I want to add this: there will come a time that you will need to hire a designer. There will. But don’t rush it.
4. Follow and unfollow on Instagram.
Or asking to exchange ‘like for likes’ on Facebook. Seriously. Fuck off. You come across as an absolute fool – desperate and only caring for the numbers. Sorry love, but that’s not who I want to look up to. Imagine if you spent more time actually creating epic content or you know, HAVING A CONVERSATION on social media instead of following and unfollowing accounts all the time. People will WANT to look up to you. Give a little more before taking.
5. Being a jill of all trades.
Slashies don’t make money. Unless your Ruby Rose. Because Ruby Rose.
But in all seriousness, don’t be everything to everyone. If that’s what you are at home, cool, that’s your decision. But online? As a business? Just one thing dahling. Just one thing.
And do it so fuckin’ well that we HAVE to pay you for it.
Don’t do these 5 things this year.
You’re better than that.